Sherry’s in surgery and I wait
Across from me a family of twelve waits for news of their loved one. He’s in for open-heart surgery. Their concern is palpable and rightly so. He could so easily slip away into that great dark night from which no one returns.
Unbidden, dark thoughts crowd my mind; demanding attention. All the what-ifs clamber for attention.
What if the infection spreads? What if it overruns her defenses and she follows her sister, mother, and father to that place where I can not go? What if she leaves me and I am left to travel the corridors of time alone?
STOP! Stop thinking like this! Stop thinking these selfish thoughts. Its only the depression trying to worm its way back into my mind. This is simple surgery and I’ll see her again shortly.
But what if I lose her? What will I do? She is the light around which my life revolves. I don’t want life without her. We have been married almost half of our lives. I can’t conceive of life without her. What would be the point?
What is life without Sherry?
The volunteer behind the desk jars me from the downward spiral of my thoughts.
‘’Can I get you some coffee or coco Mr. Lavender?’’
I shake my head and mutter a, ‘’No thank you.’’
Grateful for the reprieve from these depressing thoughts, I get up to stretch my legs.
In the hallway I get a drink and turn back to the waiting room. I pass a nurse pushing a gurney. I don’t look. It’s so invasive to stare at another at what is for many the lowest point in their lives. Don’t look. Leave them what little dignity they have left. Just walk on by.
Don’t look. Just walk on by.
The nurse pushing the gurney stops and turns.
‘’Mr. Lavender?’’
I turn and see the greatest treasure my heart has ever held; Sherry.
Sherry is home now and doing fine. All my fears were just the wanderings of a frightened mind.
I have my treasure back.
.
