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Friday, July 31, 2009

Chasing Demons


I know this is a bit ''over the top' but its all I can think of right now

Last night as I was crawling into bed I felt the demon of depression attempt to insinuate itself into my mind. Having spent the last several months relatively free from the scourge, I was acutely aware of its insidious attempts.

However, I found I was still unable to fight it off. It was just like old times….I felt completely powerless in the grip of this thing that had controlled my soul for so many years.

Nothing can describe the darkness of depression. The blanket of black that covers you as you lay there trying to sleep. Thoughts race through your mind. Thoughts of ‘’could have…should have''. Thoughts that won’t go away.

That’s where suicide is born.

When the pain of living becomes greater than the ability to cope.

Will I voluntarily step off into that abyss? No…. I believe my faith will see me through.